Dear ...

Dear Noah,
We could have sworn you said the ark wasn't leaving till 5.
Sincerely, Unicorns

Dear America,
You produced Miley Cyrus. Bieber is your punishment.
Sincerely, Canada

Dear Yahoo,
I've never heard anyone say, "I don't know, let's Yahoo! it." Just saying...
Sincerely, Google

Dear Saturn,
I liked it, so I put a ring on it. Sincerely, God

Dear Batman,
What was your power again?
Sincerely, Superman

Dear Customers,
Yes, we ARE making fun of you in Vietnamese.
Sincerely, Nail Salon Ladies

Dear World,
Please stop freaking out about 2012. Our calendars end there because some Spanish soldiers invaded our country and we got a little busy, OK? Sincerely, The Mayans

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